Over the past few weeks I’ve been going through another phase in life where I’m equally stressed and depressed which never bodes well with my anxiety. I feel as though I have so much to do in so little time and as soon as I’m getting through my list, more work gets added to it. In reality I probably achieve way more in a week than I’m telling myself but it seems I never get anything done.
I have so many essays, so much coursework, and my extra-curricular activities are really getting on top of me. All I want to do as soon as I get up, is crawl back under my warm safe duvet and go back to dreamworld where everything is perfect.
I don’t have the time to properly relax and spend time doing things that make me happy, like playing the guitar, photography, reading, or writing poetry and short stories.
On the outside I appear to be doing just fine, however inside is a mess of unfinished thoughts, feelings and messy situations that I’ve been putting off dealing with, which can all be summed up in two words: “I’m fine”.
I’m constantly battling against my inner self which keeps me up through the night causing both my mental and physical health to deteriorate.
And I don’t know what to do…
Sunday 13th November 2016
I wrote the first part of this post at the start of the week and now at the end of the week when I’m about to post this, everything has changed. I’ve been getting through my to do list little by little each day this past week and life is finally getting better again, not only that but I finally let people help. It goes to show that you really can’t get through your problems alone, whether you get help from family, friends, a teacher or whoever else, just talk to someone about the ‘stuff’ going on in your head and trust me they’ll be able to help, even if they’re only helping by listening to your problems: it’s a great start!
I hope this helps any of you going through difficult times at the moment. Remember: “the word happiness would lose all meaning if it were not balanced by sadness”. It’s all about perception.
Jade Anna x