Why I Was a Weird Child 

This was inspired by one of Phil’s (AmazingPhil a.k.a Phil Lester) pages in The Amazing Book Is Not On Fire, (which is totally awesome and you should definitely read it if you haven’t already) where he explained why he was a weird kid. I too was a weird kid.

  1. As a child I was obsessed with cheese (I still am, just maybe not as much). We had a shed in our back garden full of tools, toys, anything really and at one point, there was also a mouse. Anyway, Dad set a mouse trap (which may I add as a five or six year old, I didn’t know what this was). So me, being this weirdly obsessed with cheese child, spotted the chunk of yellow joy and reached out to take it… And obviously the mouse trap sprung out onto my finger. Ouch! I only admitted this story to my Mum a few months back and she died laughing (figuratively not literally).
  2. I used to sit under the table at my Granny and Grandad’s house and eat sugar cubes straight out of the box (yes Finnick, I will take that sugar cube from you!)
  3. During a small period of my childhood, I became weirdly religious. Now I’m not saying religion is weird, it was just weird for me considering that no one in my family was strongly religious. I used to pray every night and write down those prayers in a note book, and at one stage I was determined that I was going to be a vicar when I grew up.
  4. I used to love the TV show Dancing On Ice. I loved it so much I wanted to be an ice dancer on the show. I used to put on “slippy socks” a.k.a fluffy bed socks with no grips, and slide around the living room floor during the breaks, copying the dancers I had just seen. I even forced my brother to be my partner for several of the moves. By the way, I am awful at ice skating in real life.
  5. Leading on from that, for my birthday party, my dad took my friends and I ice skating. The day of this was April Fools Day (the day after my birthday). I thought it would be a good idea to deliberately fall on the ice and pretend I’d hurt myself. Everyone took it seriously and I was too scared to say “April Fools” so I had the pretend to suffer with an injury.
  6. Once I was in the bath at my Nan’s house and I stayed in there until the bath water went cold. Instead of asking my Nan to add more hot water, or get out of the bath like a normal human, I reached over and grabbed the towel, and draped it round me like a blanket, while in the bath.
  7. When writing the date in my school books I used to add “the” and “of” into it, for example “Monday the 7th of May 2005”.
  8. Also in my school books I used to reply to my teachers comments in the margin.
  9. I used to drink bath water.
  10. When I was younger, someone bought me a scooter, and for ages after, I never used it the normal way because I didn’t know how even though I got taught so many time. Instead, I used to sit on it, literally on the bit you usually stand on and use my feet either side to move around on it.

Hope you enjoyed this post!

Jade Anna x



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